The Official Rules Of A Day At The Beach

Summer is here so it’s time to roll out the 16^th edition of what some call “Beach Rules” or “Beach Etiquette” but is officially “The Ten Beach Commandments.” For many of us knowing the do’s and don’ts of a day at the beach are obvious but some need a crash course or reminder about how to behave when they come to the Jersey Shore. While there are other versions this is the official list.

DO NOT CROWD THY NEIGHBOR. This is not Coney Island so seek space between yourself and those nearby. It’s fine to love thy neighbor but there is no reason to sit right on top of him or her.

DO WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE. If you are engaged in conversation with your group try and avoid F-bombs that half the beach could hear.

DO WEAR A BATHING SUIT THAT MATCHES YOUR BODY-Gravity does things as we get older so if you’re going to wear a thong or speedo please first take a look in the mirror.

DO NOT FEED THE SEAGULLS. It’s nice that you’re a bird lover but when you feed one you bring the entire colony. Plus the food you’re feeding them is actually harmful to the birds.

DO LEARN HOW TO OPERATE YOUR BEACH UMBRELLA. This is especially important on a windy day. Make sure the base is dug in well, angle the umbrella into the wind and keep it as low as possible. If it takes off like a javelin and nearly spears someone don’t put it up again.

Not the right way to use an umbrella.

DO FILL IN THE HOLES YOU DIG. I’ll never understand this but for some reason when people come to the beach they have an obsession with digging, especially fathers and sons. When you are done excavating fill in the hole so nobody falls in it. Also do not bury anyone in the hole!

DO NOT LEAVE ANY GARBAGE ON THE BEACH- This includes empty water bottles and yes…diapers.

DO KEEP AN EYE ON SMALL CHILDREN. The beach is a family place but when your unattended children walk over my blanket or throw sand in my direction can you do more than just smile.

DO FOLLOW THE LIFEGUARDS DIRECTIONS. If they blow their whistle and move you there is a reason…like maybe you’re near a rip current. They are there to help you and keep swimmers safe.

Follow these simple rules and enjoy your time at the beach. More importantly, don’t ruin it for others.