Only in New Jersey: How to Say “Goodbye” When Leaving Company
It's never just "see you next time!"
With the holidays right around the corner, and people gathering with family for the first time in a year, I thought I'd break down the proper way to leave someone's house in New Jersey after eating dinner.
It's never a quick "gotta run, see you next time!"
No, it's much more than that.
Usually, when everyone is finishing dessert (after the fruit, of course), the father of the family who is visiting makes some sort of comment about how they want to avoid traffic on the turnpike or parkway. The mother yells for the kids to start getting ready to go home (they never listen, because they know it's going to be another 20 minutes from this point, at least).
Whoever hosted the dinner runs into the kitchen to try and send the company home with at least 3 Tupperware containers full of food, which the company will refuse to be polite, but end up taking anyway.
After this, the mother will yell at her kids for a second time to finish playing.
Next, the host grabs the company's coats and the long procession of "goodbyes" starts. Cue another yell for the kids to come up, followed by some sort of threat of taking something away if they don't.
We still haven't made it to the door yet, by the way.
The hosting family follows the company to the door, where the dads will usually run outside to start the car up and pack it with the shopping bags full of food. The moms will have another 10-minute conversation, minimum, and the kids will sneak away to play again.
When the mother realizes what time it is (or gets an annoyed text from her husband to wrap it up) the kids are yelled at one final time to leave, and then FINALLY the car ride home starts.